Gran

There was alot of places I wanted to celebrate Memorial Day today, a few BBQ's that sounded fun and I was craving some alone time with my boyfriend. But none of that happened....

I live with my grandma and since my grandpa died five years ago this Fathers Day, she gets very lonely and sad. My mom is usually over here to celebrate these holidays and she plans and her husband cooks and I can opt to be here or not. But my mom went to Florida and the other day my grandma was complaining that she had nothing to do for memorial day. So I planned a BBQ for just us. I was laying in bed this morning and a little sad that I had to stay home all day. Its very calm and quiet here and sometimes I feel like I am missing out on life. But tonight was fun. We bought alot of vegetables and some beef to assemble shish ka bobs and cooked some corn on the cob. I blackened almost everything a little bit and definitely burned off ALL of the hair on the my right arm and hand. (I feel the instructions on the charcoal lighter should perhaps be more specific and, well, instructive!) Then, I got the bright idea to make smores. We only had small marshmallows and I was challenged to brown them. We had fun and I realized I am lucky to be able to know my Grandma so well. Before my grandpa died, I had a conversation with him where I promised to take care of my grandma and I feel peaceful that I am fulfilling that promise to him. I do love her and days like today I am thrilled to be here and do things to make her happy.

Alot of times I get caught up in making others outside my house happy and feel so passionate about alleviating sadness, loneliness, pain and I forget that there is a tiny little lonely granny at home waiting for me to brighten up her day.